Find Something Good

How are we supposed to stay positive when there is so much tragedy, despair & evil in our world right now? It feels impossible, but there are some things we can do.

Here’s my take.

#1 – Prayer. Please, please pray. Our world, our country,  our leaders, our communities need prayer. Not only is prayer powerful, but there is something so freeing about giving it all to the only one who is truly in control.

#2 – FIND THE GOOD in anything & everything… Find something good in the tragedy. With the deadliest shooting in our country’s modern history happening less than 48 hours ago,  we are all heartbroken. Adding to that brokenness is some of our leaders & the media. Instead of focusing on the lives lost and recognizing the humanity in each of us, people are making it POLITICAL. But folks, this is not political. WHO CARES if the victims were  Republican / Democrat, Gay / Straight, Black / White, Male / Female, Old / Young, etc, etc. Stephen Paddock did not discriminate when he fired into the crowd. For some unknown reason, he wanted death, fear and destruction for everyone at that concert, and that’s just what he got. We all know the gory details, but what isn’t getting much coverage is the way our country is pulling together in light of this horrific event. Blood banks had people lined up all day yesterday, thousands and thousands of dollars have been donated to help the families of the victims. Try to find the good.

🙏✌️N.T.

Thanks Mom.

This year, I’m keeping it positive. I’m tired of the negativity; both from my surroundings and from my thoughts. So for awhile my posts are going to be thank you posts. I’m going to be counting my blessings, and at the top of the list are the people who keep me motivated through this thing called life.

Up first, of course, is my Momma.

I don’t quite know how I can put into words how thankful I am for this woman that I am forever indebted to. My mom raised twins by herself for the most part. We both had our moments – but of the two of us I know I caused her more sleepless nights than my brother. I wasn’t an easy kid, and I certainly wasn’t an easy teenager. But somehow my mom managed to keep me in her prayers and say “I love you,” every day without fail. Being older and having seen people I love do some self-destructive things, or even say that they’re thinking about hurting themselves, I cannot even begin to fathom how much pain I caused my mom. She had to see the aftermath of suicide attempts and years of self-harm and bulimia. She had to see her daughter, in her house, trying to hurt herself, and trying very hard. I can’t even imagine. Honestly, I can’t even say that I would take it back because everything that I’ve gone through has made me who I am – but I certainly wouldn’t be here if she hadn’t stuck by my side all of these years. I know people who went through less than I did whose parents gave up on them. But here she was; paying for therapy, visiting me every day in hospitals, doing everything in her power to get me into an inpatient rehab program before I turned 18… she saved my life. My mom literally saved my life, and it’s not something that I acknowledge enough. Thank you Mom. For not only putting up with me, but for loving me through the most difficult days. Thank you for always being a phone call away, even at 3 am. Thank you for continuing to encourage me and for being my inspiration. Thank you for being a faithful prayer warrior.

Aside from being an angel in my life that I don’t recognize enough… I’m so thankful that we share a passion for horses, a passion that you ignited in my heart before I can even remember. Some of my fondest memories are going to barrel races with you growing up, and our traditional McDonald’s chicken nuggets afterwards. 🙂 Thank you for always doing everything you possibly can to support my passion and my dream.

The thing is, though – I know it’s not just me whose life you have impacted. You are a beautiful person inside and out. You are always there to help friends, family, strangers – you have the biggest heart. Your smile is infectious, your sincerity is noticed, and your love is unconditional.

Thank you for being you, Mom. You are such a blessing to me, and I definitely don’t say it enough. I love you.

❤N.O.

Lessons from a Horse

I recently became a horse owner again, an unexpected and wonderful blessing. I could not be happier about it, but there is something about longing for an event, person, place or thing for so long (I had been without a horse for about 2 1/2 years) and then finally getting it; we often forget that most of these things come with their own unique challenges, difficulties or conflicts. While dreaming about barrel racing again – I had seemingly forgot about all of the hard work it will take to get my horse ready to race.

My horse, Scooby, has already found her way into my heart. She is the sweetest little girl with a big heart and a fun personality. Scooby has had an interesting life though – for the majority of her 9 years she has been running free with no authority of any kind. She has the mindset of a youngster, even though she isn’t. While riding the other day I just kept asking her and hoping that she would just stop worrying, trust me – and give me the reins instead of fighting me. I love her, and want nothing but the best for her – but I know that there are going to be lots of baby steps to take before we really go places.

I tend to pray while I ride – it’s where I am most at peace. I guess I was just asking for a little guidance for both myself & Scooby. But I usually feel guilty after I pray because I don’t do it often, and it seems I only do pray when I am asking for something… something that I want. I have tried so hard to convince myself that my life is going how God wants it to – this would mean that I both have control and at the same time I am allowing God’s will to be done.

After my session with Scooby was over I got off and was grooming her when I got to thinking… Scooby & I are alike in many ways.

I believe in a God who has loved me even before I was a twinkle in my momma’s eye; a God who longs for me to just stop worrying, trust Him – and give Him the reins instead of fighting Him. He loves me and wants nothing but the best for me.

How ironic is it that I’m asking this beautiful creature who has known me for only a short time to trust me with her life, when I can’t even release control of my own life to the One who created me? Quite ironic I think.

As I go back to the basics with Scooby so that we can work our way towards a fully trusting relationship, I’m also going to go back to the basics with Jesus so that I can work towards a complete relationship with Him.

running horse

Jesus Take the Reins

-N.O.